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Showering

FEISTY

DOFCH.COM
DOFCH.COM
#1
*How to Shower Like a Woman

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint enhanced conditioner.
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
Rinse conditioner off hair.
Shave armpits and legs. Turn off shower. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
Spray mold spots with Tilex.
Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.
Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

*How To Shower Like a Man

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound
Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits.
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
Pee.
Rinse off and get out of shower.
Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
Admire wiener size in mirror again.
Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
Throw wet towel on bed.
If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something so very wrong with you.


 

Romeo

WCM Ol'School Freestyler
LatinFreestyle.Com
#3
[b said:
Quote[/b] (feisty @ April 04 2005, 7:24 am)]*How To Shower Like a Man
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile <-- yup

Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound <-- everything but the woo woo LMAO

Look at your manly physique in the mirror. <-- done till i got ugly lol

Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. <-- i proud of him hehe but only a selected few get to see LMAO

Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits. <-- doesn't everyone?

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. <-- wtf you want me to do get out the shower and grab a tissue.. thats stupid LOL

Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. <-- Ok i don't do that.

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. <-- Your not fully clean unless your Zest fully clean LMAO

Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. <-- im so happy i dont have a hairy butt lol baby smooth LMAO

Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. <-- OK who hassnt done that ??

Pee. <-- umm i usually pee befor i go in.

Rinse off and get out of shower. <-- everyone does that

Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. <-- i dont dry off i like to stay wet OH YA LOL

Admire wiener size in mirror again. <-- im not coceeded

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. <-- so i forget...sue me

Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again. <-- once is enough.. second time its getting wet another way.

Throw wet towel on bed. <-- i get dressed in the bathroom
 
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